Immy slipped in the bath last night. Fortunately she didn’t bang her head or suffer any great injury but she did come up spluttering and coughing after taking on water.
Shortly after, when I was putting her to bed I couldn’t help worrying about the slip and more importantly, the water. Some time ago I saw an episode of Oprah where they were talking about dry drowning and ever since I worry myself sick about any water related incidents. I am sure it is an irrational fear. I tell myself I am being silly. But still I worry. I usually don’t go in to her room during the night but last night I knew that I would keep checking to see that she was alright. She is fine.
I can no longer bear watching episodes of Law & Order and other dramas when they involve children being hurt or injured. I am skim reading my latest Jodi Piccoult book as I cannot bear to fully read the scenes where the little girl with OI is injured. I recently read a blog post about a toddler who died of SIDS and I have worried more about Immy and SIDS ever since.
Is it just me or do all Mums feel a heightened sense of fear for their child? What is it that makes us worry so? Will my fear and anxiety reduce as Immy grows or will it increase as she makes her way out into the world without us? Why didn’t anyone warn me that motherhood would be so hard?