I am doing it again, second guessing myself!
Does it never end?
This time around it is (once again) about sleep – surely sleeping and eating must be the biggest contributors to parents sprouting grey hairs…at least when they are babies? – and it reminded me of a conversation I jotted down as potential blog fodder when AJ was just three months old…
I was at the shops this past weekend when I was reminded of a very important parenting truth. As I hushed my grizzly bub, rocking her pram and saying to her, “You are tired and just really, really need to go to sleep, ” another mum overheard and made me smile when she responded, “Hasn’t she read the book, then?”
Oh yes, how many times have I lamented that my baby didn’t come with with a manual? Instead something changes – in this case she is waking a lot again, and early, oh so, so early – and the crisis of faith in my own parenting ability hits again. I rush to the stack of 4227 baby books I have mysteriously accumulated over the course of two babies looking for some tiny gem of wisdom that I might have missed the other 333 times I have done this very same thing.
I question myself – if only I was tougher. Or softer. Or co-slept. Or control cried. Or fed to sleep. Or rocked to sleep. Or enforced this routine. Or that one. Or her own routine?
Maybe she is sick? Overtired? Not tired? Hungry? In pain? Teething?
I JUST WANT TO FIX IT!!! And then go back to sleep!
But she is not broken and she does not need fixing.
Instead I need to remind myself (again) that if anything is constant with small people, it is that just as you get a handle on one particular issue, the whole scenario will change.
Hopefully for the better.
Phrases, “This is just the season we are in. This too shall pass,” run on fast forward around my tired, befuddled brain.
I give myself the standard pep talk about how I am doing my best for my baby right now with the resources I have available. I know my child best. I need to trust my own judgement.
I close the books.
“This is just the season we are in. This too shall pass. This is just the season we are in. This too shall pass. This is just the season we are in.”
This is the stuff I know to be true.
But I also know…I will keep second guessing myself!
What is your biggest parenting challenge right now? What do you do when you feel like you just don’t have the answers? Are you a second-guessing repeat offender?
- Musings on Motherhood: The Second Time Around
- You Are Your Child’s Strongest Advocate…Whatever Their Age
- Pressing Pause
- Things I Had Forgotten About Life With a Newborn